Preferences and references: personalising your elopement ceremony
Many of the couples I marry have a ‘special’ movie that’s ‘theirs’. Or if not a movie, perhaps a TV show. Perhaps a band. Very often, a song.
Perhaps it’s some form of art that has sentimental value for a couple – a mutual memory embedded in that flick, show, or tune. And when that’s the case, I LOVE to have some fun with the ‘shared love’ that they’ve shared with me.
Example: a couple tells me they watch Titanic together on every anniversary and unashamedly love every single thing about it (I’m not too dissimilar). Since I keep my ceremony scripts a surprise until the day (for big weddings and elopements alike), such a couple may just find me dropping a line or two from Titanic at appropriate moments within the more light-hearted parts of their ceremony. Maybe the groom umm-ed and ahh-ed over whether to text the bride to set up their first date, but he ultimately realised that you need to take life as it comes to you… to make each day count. Maybe she stumbled upon the ring a week before he proposed, but didn’t tell him because a woman’s heart is a deep ocean of secrets.
The key here is that you don’t trouble your noggin over how such references might be weaved in smoothly. That’s my job, you see; squirrelling away to research your guilty pleasure and sling some spiffy sentences together is what I’m in this game for.
That said, sometimes more explicit references naturally arise in a couple’s questionnaire responses, and gosh are they fun to include when telling that couple’s love story. In one of our elopements last year, for example, I described how the groom once made his bride a not-so-subtle mixed CD. The CD featured Burn for You by John Farnham to hilariously drive home the fact that he liked her. He really liked her. And so it was simply perfect telling the later part of their story, the part where this bride proposed to this groom by having their daughters hold a sign reading “Daddy, will you marry mummy?”, accompanied by the carefully selected soundtrack of Burn For You. Brilliance.
Finally, a special pop culture reference is something YOU can add in yourself, if you wish. Your personalised vows are an awesome opportunity to do so. And to exemplify this, I’m going to leave you with the fabulous last line of the vows written by the first groom I ever married. After many heartfelt words, this charming man stood before his beautiful partner and said:
“I love you more than Terry Jeffords loves yogurt”.
Words by Kahani Motiani - resident celebrant for all of Elsewhere’s elopements.